The Answers
Along with point breakdowns and comments
- "I dreamt I was a moron..."
Squall Leonhart, Final Fantasy VIII (2)
Almost everyone got this one.
- He had prided himself at that moment on having managed to convey the impression that
he had made a tick in a small box marked "Potatoes."
Douglas Adams, The Long, Dark Teatime of the Soul (2)
Several people got the Douglas Adams part right, but most of them attributed this to the Hitchhiker books.
- "Now you'll see why they call me Mesdoram."
"Uh... why do they call you Mesdoram?"
"Because it's my first name, stupid."
Fei Fong Wong and Marquis Elmdor, Xenogears Solid Integral by Fritz Fraundorf (3)
Yeah, I accepted "Mesdoram," but come *on*, people :P
- "What is black and white and makes you duck when it moves by?"
"A nun with a spear through her head."
The first Guardian of Yffi and K'z'k, Sluggy Freelance (3)
- "He had threatened to kill me in public."
"Why would he want to kill you in public?"
"I think she meant he threatened, in public, to kill her."
"Oh."
Miss Scarlet, Mrs. White, Wadsworth, Clue (4)
A lot of people got this one, too.
- "I am the Supreme Being. I'm not entirely dim."
The Supreme Being (Sir Ralph Richardson), Time Bandits (2)
- "Nooooooorm Aaaaabraaaaaaaam!"
The Lobe, Freakazoid! (2)
Several people got that this was from Freakazoid! (specifically, the episode "Normadeus") but no one got the speaker right.
- "I've been picking fights with most of my friends and family, and I've even won a
few times. I should've beat Grandma, but she sucker-punched me when I tred to give her
walker back."
Random tournament entrant, Lunar 2: Eternal Blue (2)
*No one* got this one.
- "She's really protruberating!"
Crow, MST of The Eye of Argon (2)
If you haven't read this one, do so right now.
- "This was the darkened Items won't appear."
Professor Daravon/Tutorial, Final Fantasy Tactics (2)
I almost did "I got a good feeling!", but that's been done to death...
- "You see, evil is like...it's like a bowl of oranges, only one, instead, is an orange
of doom... That orange has a fate... A fate to rule over the other oranges with
an iron fist. That orange is me."
Lord Khrima, Adventurers! (2)
I love this quote.
- When my Legions of Terror park their vehicle to do reconnaissance on foot, they will
be instructed to employ The Club.
Why, Peter Anspach's Evil Overlord List, of course (1)
- "Yes! I am alive! And I am filled with goo. Mission goo."
Zim, Invader Zim (2)
You probably guessed this one was W4's ^_^
- "We can't save the world from a CD player!"
Vyse, Skies of Arcadia (2)
Specifically, when you put the GD-Rom in a CD player.
- "What's worse than square one? Negative bupkes? Minus zippo?"
Lt. Sgt. Capt. Donald Cragen, Law and Order (2)
No one agreed on his rank; I don't watch the show often enough to remember, and I'm too tired to go find out.
- "Oh Lord, heal this bike."
Crowley, Good Omens, by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett (2)
Come on, you didn't really think we'd get through this without a Pratchett ref, did you?
- "No time for that now. I've got to go back in time and give condoms to your parents."
Brent Sienna, PvP (2)
- "Shut up and BLEED, motherfucker!"
Needles "Sweat Tooth" Kane, Twisted Metal: Black (2)
Seems like everyone got this but me.
- "Hey, look what washed ashore. A fish, a boot and a wrong answer."
Nate Shapiro, You Don't Know Jack (2)
No one got this one, either.
- "That's the news, and I am outta here!"
Dennis Miller, Saturday Night Live (2)
Specifically, Weekend Update. As far as I know, he was not eating toast.
- "Those are not good noises...those are bad noises!"
Lusiphir, Poison Elves (2)
- "You waited too long to make your move, and now you're in... The Friend Zone."
Joey, Friends (2)
I now know that Friends is in syndication even on the other side of the world.
- "I like my coffee like I like my women: cream and two sugars."
Mike Myers, Saturday Night Live (2)
- "It's the treat that can't be beat! Grandma's Chicken Feet!"
Talk Soup (1)
Everyone who got this said it was John Henson, but Woof only specified
"Talk Soup"; thus, it's only worth one point.
The Winners
First Prize goes to Devi Batti-Loupstein, who scored 35 of 50 possible points.
Second Prize goes to Mark Poa, who has now won something two years in a row with 33 of 50 possible points.
Outrageous Liar Prize goes to James Howard, the Astonishing Long-Distance Vocal Communication Implement Mulitmediocre Knight.
A list of outrageous lies is available here.
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