*/\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\*

Indie Madnesse proudly presents:

IMPROFICROAST: Improvisational MiSTing
               or
               How I Learned To Stop Worrying And Come Up With Riffs In
               Two Days
               http://www.students.rhodes.edu/%7Eknoke/indie/indie.html

Episode 004:   Superfriends: A Suprizing Puzzle

Participants:
-Jonatan Streith (a99jonst@ida.his.se)
 Intro, MiSTing, Conclusion, Proofreading
-Kate Malloy (kamalloy@home.com)
 Intro, MiSTing, Conclusion
-Mark Poa (recklessflyer@mechpilot.com)
 Intro, MiSTing, Conclusion, Proofreading
-NeoVid (neovid@hotmail.com)
 Intro, MiSTing, Conclusion
-Neo Vox (suzaku@madasafish.com)
 Intro, MiSTing, Conclusion
-Ranma X (drstupid@geocities.com)
 Intro, MiSTing, Conclusion, Guest Villain
-Ripper Jak (WYVERN5555@aol.com)
 Intro, MiSTing, Conclusion
-SECRET WORKER (winkstwo@sssnet.com)
 Conclusion
-W4 (indiemadw4@home.com)
 MiSTing, Conclusion, Editor

*/\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\*

OBLIGITARY LEGAL BLAH

        MST3K & the related characters are owned and copyrighted by Best 
Brains Inc.
        Jonatan Streith, Kate Malloy, Mark Poa, NeoVid, Neo Vox, Ranma X,
Ripper Jak and W4 are owned and copyrighted by their respective creators.
        ImproFicRoast is owned and copyrighted by Indie Madnesse.
        "Superfriends" is copyright by DC Comics and Hanna-Barbera.

MISTING CLASSIFICATION

[MST]:    Meta-Misting - Misting Of A Misting, Or A Unusual Misting
          The misting was completely improvised; see the ImproFicRoast
          home page for more details.
[NONE]:   Era Unknown or Unspecified
          The cast and characters are completely independent of the
          "Mystery Science Theater 3000" Storyline.
[TOON]:   General Cartoon Fanfiction
          The story is based on the cartoon show, "Superfriends."

*/\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\*

	Deep in the bowels of a man's soul lie the forces of evil.  While
that really doesn't say anything, or in fact mean much of anything, it's
an interesting thing to know.
	This was especially the case for Ranma X.
	Throughout the course of not one, or even two, but THREE
sessions, usually directed by "Mad Dr. Kichigaisakka", he was forced to
read bad fiction for whatever reason.
	After the third fic, he snapped.

*/\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\*

	R. Jak looked carefully at the note scrawled in crayon for the
fifth time.  "Congratulations," it began.  "You are lucky recipient of one
(1) free tour supplied by lucky Dr. Kichigaisakka's Movie Studio and one
(1) free screen test.  Please follow directions carefully.  One night
only."
	He looked up at the dilapidated theater.  Yep.  This was the
place, alright.  Rather shoddy look, but it did look like a movie studio.
Of course, Jak wasn't going to argue.  Besides, how often does one get
free tours?
	"Hey."
	He heard a voice from behind him.  Jak wheeled around.  A new
figure stood on the street.  The newcomer wore a black silk shirt,
sunglasses, and a red dragon emblem.  Jak blinked.
	"Who are you?" he asked warily.
	"Neo Vox," the new figure replied.  "You here for the tours, too?"
	"Yeah.  Suppose so."  Jak extended his hand.  "Ryan Jakobi. Nice
to meet you... Vox."
	The two shook hands.
	"You got a note, too?" Jak asked.
	"Yeah.  Scrawled in crayon, though.  Rather shoddy.  Had some free
time, so I thought I could check out the place and maybe get on the tour."
Jak stared at him blankly. 
	"This is my first time here, so I want to get some grips of this
place," he explained, scratching his head.
	"Yeah, mine too," Jak replied.  "So, what you know about this...
tour?"
	"Well, they give tours of the whole studio around here.  Though
it's not much to look at, is it?"  Vox paused and looked at the theater
as if to confirm his suspicion.  He turned back.  "My note said that the
tours start at a 'Beware the Radish' van."
	"'Beware the Radish?'  What?  Are they some sort of Veganphobes?"
	"Never bothered to ask."  Vox took off his sunglasses.  "You want
to help me find it?"
	Jak shrugged.  "Why not?  Got nothing better to do." 
	They walked along until they saw a white, beat-up Dodge van parked
by the side of the road.  On the sides, the words "Betty Ford" had been
crossed out and the words "t0uRs H3R3, d00D5" had been written on the side.
	R.Jak looked at the van with an air of suspicion.  "Since when did
BTR start spelling like AOL chatroomers?" 
	Neo Vox looked around.  "If this is the only way to get around,
then we'd better take the tour." 
	They both got on the van, driving off to somewhere in the studio.
	A few minutes later, the real tour van arrived.

*/\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\*

	Somewhere else, Mark and NeoVid were lounging around.
	"So how did that whole revenge thing pan out?  Signus was telling
me about it," Mark asked NeoVid.
	"It was OK.  More people wanted to pound W4 than me, even though
I did get trashed.  Anyway, I think High Stakes kinda benefited from the
publicity," he said, looking at a pointy-stick hole in his arm.  "Boy, I
hope that fills in soon..."
	"You should have someone take a look at it," Mark suggested.  "The
light that hole's giving off is kind of gross."
	"No, I don't think so.  'Sides, I heal fast anyway."
NeoVid shrugged.
	A man in an all-covering cloak came by.
	"Would you be the ones known as NeoVid and Mark Poa?" he drolled
out in a usual clandestine fashion.  The two nodded and the man said,
"Good.... Because you might win a million dollars!" the man said as he
removed his cloak to reveal his identity to be none other than Regis
Philbin.
	"Really?" Mark inquired, looking unconvinced.  "What's the catch?
There's almost always a catch in these things."
	"'Almost always?'  There's always one," NeoVid commented.
	"I assure you.  There's no catch here," Regis said, flashing a
smile that showed a bit too much teeth.  "Just follow me."  He started to
walk away.
	Mark and NeoVid just stood there.
	"Come on!  Lets win some cash!" Regis said.
	"Why?  I don't need it," NeoVid noted.
	"And it looks like a really obvious trick."
	"Come on!  What have ya got to lose?!" Regis asked coyly.
	"Our lives?  Our sanity?  Oh, come off it!  It's a trick!  I mean
I-" Mark interjected angrily but was knocked out cold by an unknown force.
	"What the hell?!" NeoVid said as he shot out a ball of Chaos power
at Regis who deflected it with a magic shield of some sort.
	"And to think... you could've won a million dollars," Regis said
as he blasted NeoVid with an amplified version of the Chaos power,
knocking him out.
	Regis said calmly, "Nice work, Xelloss."
	"No problem."
	"Why are you helping out anyway?"
	"Sore wa...AAGH!" Xellos said as he was teleported against his
will back to where he came from.
	"No it's not, Xelloss," Regis said as he teleported the two fanfic
authors somewhere.

*/\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\*

	Jonatan walked home unsteadily, more tipsy than usual.  "Damn
those purple-clad demons... I know they cheated."  He clutched his head.
"Ugh.  And next time, I'll stay away from the green drinks.  In fact,
I'm.... going to pass out now."
	Rolling his eyes up into his head, Jonatan did indeed pass out. As
usual, in these sorts of things, no one seemed to pay any mind, though he
was in fact lying down in the middle of traffic.
	While the local traffic would definitely run him over without a
moment's notice, save a few expletives, Jonatan disappeared in a glow of
light before anyone had a chance to do so.

*/\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\*

	Kate sat around looking at her altar.
	Most people visit some form of altar.
	Few people own one.
	Even fewer of them have altars dedicated to guys from Final
Fantasy games.
	"Wai... Irvine..." Kate said while looking at her collection,
which currently consisted of at least ten action figures, several volumes
of doujinshi, lots of fanart from various talented 'net artists, and, of
course, twenty eight different Triple Triad cards.
	Someone knocked at the door, and she wondered who it could be.
She got up and answered it.  On the other side of the door was a young,
fairly non-descript male of about 18 odd years.
	"Hi!  May I help you?" she asked, slightly annoyed at the
interruption.
	"...[hello.]..." the figure thought to Kate.
	She blinked.  "Um...okay.  What do you want?"
	"...[all will be explained.]"
	"Dammit!  I have bishounen to drool over, I have to polish my
armor and my lance, and I'm tired of this silent psychic crap!  I mean,
like, it gets really old and-"
	"All right already, dammit!" the figure said as he teleported Kate
from the area.
	"My revenge will be ready.  But first, I'm getting a Slurpee."

*/\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\*

	And, in the course of all these events, the six people made their
way to a small, non-descript room.
	"What the-?!  Where are we?"  Neo Vox asked from somewhere in the
room.
	Mark and NeoVid were only starting to awaken.  "I hate getting
knocked out," Mark commented dryly.  He looked up and around the room the
same time Kate walked near them, also looking around.
	Mark and Kate paled.  NeoVid said, "Oooo... popcorn..." then
looked around and groaned something along the lines of "Oh no.  Not
again."  They figured out the trap.  Jonatan would have as well if he
were not sleeping soundly on the floor.
	There was a long tense silence.
	Jonatan opened an eye and peered upwards.  "Who're the weird guys
in the trenchcoats, anyway?" Jonatan asked as he finally regained
coherency.  Deciding that the floor was far too uncomfortable to lie on,
he sat up.
	"Uh...yeah," R. Jak began, due to the fact that Neo Vox was a bit
disoriented.  "I'm R. Jak.  The other guy is named Neo Vox.  Nice to meet
you."  He waved, then stopped.
	"NEO Vox?" Mark said.  He turned to NeoVid.  "You never said you
had relatives, Vid."
	"I don't have any," NeoVid protested.  "He's obviously an evil
construct from Woof.  I say we kill it." He took a baseball bat out of his
jacket and raised it menacingly.
	"NO!" Neo Vox shouted, suddenly gaining access to his mental
facilities. "No!  I'm normal."  He paused. "Who's Woof?"
	"Put the bat down, Vid.  He looks harmless," Mark advised.  NeoVid
groaned and tucked it away.
	"By the way," R. Jak asked.  "You guys never mentioned who YOU
were."
	"Yeah," Kate replied.  "Well, Jonatan's the drunk one..."
	"Evenin'," Jonatan said, waving briefly, then giving a stifled
burp.
	"...the the other two over there are Mark and NeoVid, and I'm
Kate." 
	"Hi," Mark and NeoVid responded. 
	"You guys have any idea where we are anyway?" Neo Vox asked
nervously.
	R. Jak looked at Kate's pseudo-Team Rocket gear.  "From the looks
of it, it seems we're in a break room for the Pokemon Convention." 
	"No, that's not nearly as much fun as this..." NeoVid started to
say.
	"You think this is fun?" Mark asked disbelievingly.  "What's wrong
with you?"
	NeoVid smiled.  "Do you want the entire list?"
	"List?" Mark asked quizzically, then, realizing what NeoVid was
talking about, added, "Er, no thanks.  I think that the less I know, the
better off I'll be."
	"Smart boy," NeoVid commented. 
	"So, where are we?" R. Jak asked, getting impatient.
	"Maybe I should answer that."
	A voice which Kate, Jonatan, NeoVid and Mark found to be familiar
answered for him.  A TV screen, which the group had not noticed until now,
appeared in one of the walls.  It flickered on, showing the face of...
	"Ranma X?!?" Mark, Kate, and NeoVid gasped.
	"Who?" Neo Vox asked.
	"Shhhhh!" 
	Jonatan frowned. "Say, Doc.  You look different."
	"Quiet!" Ranma X yelled.  "Now is not the time for inane banter."
His eyes started glowing.
	"Why not?" Mark demanded.
	"I said 'SILENCE!'"
	Mark gulped. "Yeah.  Sorry.  Please continue."
	"Good."  Ranma X cleared his throat rather dramatically. "I have
decided that it is time I get my revenge on you all.  Especially you,
Woofer.  I have suffered an innumerable amount of pain because of you.
And..."
	"Woofer isn't here, Ran," Mark interjected.
	Ranma X blinked. "What?"
	"He isn't here, Ran," Mark repeated slowly.
	"He...isn't?!" Ranma X looked both shocked and angered.  He looked
and saw that, indeed, the mad Dr. Kichigaisakka was not present.
	Ranma X faced Regis Philbin. "I thought I told you to bring me Dr.
Kichigaisakka as well!" he demanded.
	Regis sweatdropped. "Isn't he the one wearing the yellow coat?"
	Ranma X sighed. "No, he is NOT the one in the yellow coat.  He's a
guy with a GREEN coat.  And he has weird hair."
	"Well, you see, we kinda DID find that guy.  But he was sorta...
badmouthing you and uh...we sorta banished him into another dimension...
you know?"
	"You didn't really find him, did you?"
	The demon looked down at his feet. "No." 
	Ranma X was not amused, which was evident when he flattened his
lackey with a ki-charged spatula.
	Ranma X sighed. "It's hard to find good help these days," he
muttered.
	"Okay.  Uh... so, can we go now?" NeoVid suggested.
	"No!" Ranma shouted.  "You will all still suffer my wrath.  I'm
hurt, and I need to vent!  As of today, many of you have seen the horrors
of 'The Dark, Bottomless Well', 'High Stakes #1' and of course,
'Gourrigan's Island: Fear And Loathing in Gourrigan's Island!' And to make
matters worse, you people were being annoying and insulting me!" 
	"*I* didn't insult you, Ranma X," Kate replied.
	"Me neither," Jon replied.  "Well, maybe I did, but I don't
remember."
	"That's coz you were DRUNK half the time," Mark reminded Jon.  He
turned to Ranma X.  "And if I recall correctly, YOU were more of a little
foolhardy with that spatula of yours on ME, not the other way around."
	"I wasn't there..." NeoVid mumbled.
	"Could someone PLEASE explain to me what's going on?!?" R. Jak
screamed.
	"SILENCE!!!!!" Ranma X yelled at the top of his voice, effectively
shutting everyone up. "Can I continue now?"
	"Yes," everyone said reluctantly.
	"However," Ranma X continued for the third time, "these were
amateur fics.  They were painful.  I should know.  But I will lash out
with the most godawful fic you will have ever witnessed before or since!"
	"You're not gonna show anything by Superjizz, are you?" Neo Vox
asked.
	Ranma X glared at the new guy. "Do you WANT Superjizz?"
	"No.  I was just asking," Neo Vox smiled, then shut up.
	"Actually, the fic I prepared is one of Dr. Thinker's masterpieces
called 'Superfriends: A Surprising Puzzle'!"
	Ranma X paused dramatically to hear the shrieks of pain sure to
follow.
	"Thinker?" R. Jak smiled.  "You mean...Daravon boy?"
	"Yes! I always wanted one of those!" Jonatan said.
	NeoVid almost 'wai'ed.  "Wow. I never thought I could get a chance
at Thinker!"
	Mark's face lit up.  "Thinker?  Heck, I don't care who wrote it. A
Superfriends fic is more up my alley!"  He reached into his pocket and
brought out a Green Lantern ring. "Bring it on!  Woohoo!"
	The group cheered.
	Ranma X's face frowned. "Oh, you may cheer now, but when this is
through, I assure you that you won't be cheering.  Now, let me send the..."
	"Wait!  No!  You can't!" Neo Vox said.
	"Too late!" Ranma X said, about to press the button.
	"No!  You don't understand!  I have to use the bathroom!"
	"OH!  I mean... Oh.  Fine, then.  But hurry up!" Ranma X said in
annoyance as Neo Vox ran out and came back a few minutes later, looking
relieved and refreshed.
	"Very well, then!  Goodbye, losers!" Ranma X said, pressing the
pretty red button opening the theater. 
	"What?" R. Jak said disappointedly.  "No flashing lights and people
screaming 'Fanfic sign?'"
	"Just wait a while.  This MSTing Theater's a bit new," Mark
informed him.
	Jonatan smirked. "Well, if you insist... WE HAVE FANFIC SIGN!"
	"Good to see that someone follows tradition," R. Jak said.

*/\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\*

DOOR SEQUENCE

7: It's a wall of empty, neatly stacked soda cans. You gleefully bring it
   down, then proceed.
6: It's a giant TV, showing Barney.  Ick.  NeoVid blows the TV up, then
   you negotiate through the remains.
5: Irvine Kinneas swamped by fans.  You pull Kate away from Irvine as you
   push through.
4: The drawbridge from MST3K.  Kate pushes Jonatan under the falling
   drawbridge, which conks him in the head.
3: It's covered with twenty types of locks, and the instructions to open
   it are in Thinkerese, so you can never figure them out.  NeoVid punches
   it once and it crumbles.
2: It's basically just a rectangular square of raspberry Jell-o.  The
   group eats through it and makes their way into the theater.
1: A MegaMan-style wall.  The group touches it, floats through, and it
   shuts behind them.  

*/\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\*

Mark: Green Lantern had better be in this...
NeoVid: I hope so, too!  I can get a lot of riffs out of GL's only
        weakness being wood... [Green Lantern] Get your wood away from me!
Mark: It hasn't started yet, and he's in Warped Mode.  Aaandd it depends
      on which Green Lantern it is.  Alan Scott, the Golden Age GL, can't
      affect wood. Hal Jordan, the Silver Age GL, has a yellow
      weakmmmppphhh!!
(NeoVid and Jonatan clamp their hands over Mark's mouth.)
Jonatan: Save that for later.  We have a fic to finish.

> SUPERFRIENDS
> In

Jonatan: Bikinis and wrestling in oatmeal!
R. Jak: Already with the hentai riffs?
Kate: I'm surprised he held out for as long as he did.

> "A Suprizing Puzzle"
> A "SUPERFRIENDS" Fanfiction by

Mark: This subtitle brought to you by the Department of Redundancy
      Department.

> Dr. Thinker

(THe group gives a standing ovation.)

> Note 1: SUPERFRIENDS are copyright by
> Hana-Banana and DC Comics. 

NeoVid: ...Hana-Banana?  That a Japanese Pokemon's name, right?
R. Jak: They merged with Chiquita?
Neo Vox: At least it's an original name.
NeoVid: (sarcastic) Gee, I wonder why...

> Note 2: This is a fake summary. 

Jonatan [Lord Thinker]: A REAL summary would include pictures.

> A fake
> summary is similar to my "Sailor Moon
> OAV" & "Team Pokemon Vs Team Rocket".
> In other words, a fake summary is a
> summary of a eposide that didn't
> happen. 

Kate: So he's saying this is a figment of our imagination?
Mark: Sounds like it.
Neo Vox: It's more like an unoffical episode guide which happens to
         summarize non-existent episodes. (pause) Why?
R.Jak: Just smile and nod.  Smile and nod.

> Similar to fan-fiction.

All: Oh.
Kate: I thought everything Thinker writes is similar to fanfiction.

> Note 3: If you like it e-mail me at
> winkstwo@sssnet.com

R. Jak [Lord Thinker]: You don't like it, I beat you up.

> Note 4: For this story to work, it's
> 1963 (The Sliver Age)

Jonatan: The Sliver Age: when people walked around and cut slivers out of
         their fellow man.
NeoVid: Naw.  The Sliver Age was when all comic books could give you
        splinters.

>and The Legion of Doom has disbanned. 

Mark: The Legion of Doom?  As in the wrestling tag team?
Jonatan: And apparently they were so hated, they weren't only banned but
         disbanned as well.

> #######################################

Neo Vox: The bloody pound key's stuck!

> Batman and Robin arrives at the Hall of
> Justice. Batman and Robin are planning
> on looking at missed trouble 

NeoVid [Batman]: Damn!  That Miss Trouble is hot!
Jonatan [Robin]: Holy hormones, Batman!

>alert via
> the computer. 

Kate: They have an answering machine?
R. Jak [answering machine]: Your call is important to us.  Just try to
                            stay alive until our representatives come back.

> Most of the trouble alert
> are clean,

Jonatan: Because the enlightened, environment-caring villain today uses
         Crime-Fresher, guaranteed to make your crimes sparklingly clean!
         Now with a mint-fresh scent!  Buy Crime-Fresher today!

> expectct for one that happen
> to be alienish rocket ship that same to
> clashed.

R. Jak [Alien interior designer]: Like, your ship SOO clashes.  Didn't you
                                  THINK when you picked the colors?

> Batman and Robin zoomed in and
> see a female shadow of Superman. 

Mark [Robin]: Holy shadowy sex changes, Batman!
Kate [Jusenkyo Guide]: Ohhhh, you fall in Spring of Drowned Girl Shadow.
                       Very bad for you, sir.
Jonatan: Superman cross-dresses?
NeoVid: That's why he has that 'S' for 'Straight' on his chest.

> Superman looks at them. He thinks of
> either revealing "it" 

NeoVid: But it was so tiny that he was embarrassed to.

>or keeping "it" a
> sercet. 

Kate: So they put "it" in a box.

> Then he sees "it" 

Jonatan: The Black Wyvern?

>and we see
> Superman's nervous face turn into a
> smile. 

(Mark mimics opening up a box.)
Mark [Superman]: And with this kryptonite, I shall put and end to
                 Superma... oh, crud.
(Mark falls over.)
Kate: You okay?
(Mark gives a thumbs-up sign from his prone position.)

> The next day, Batman and Robin arrives
> early.

(Mark returns to his seat.)
Mark: Ouch!  I fell harder than expected.  (grimaces)  What'd I miss?
NeoVid: Not much.

> One again, they talk with a early
> arrive, Wonder Woman. 

Neo Vox: Woo hoo!  'Bout time she showed up.
Mark: I'm still waiting for a Green Lantern to show up.  Any Green Lantern.

> The Trouble Alert is still mess up,

R. Jak: But it still has the Sailor Moon porn Aquaman downloaded.
(Jonatan gives R. Jak a dirty look.)
R. Jak: Can't let you have all the hentai riffs this time.

> but when they zoom in a rocketship. Superman and a strange humant 

R. Jak: Ooh.  Giant ants.
Mark: Nobody will accuse these guys of not being an equal opportunity
      organization.
Neo Vox: Humant?  Is that the top halves of a human and a mutant stuck
         together like Vannila and Chocolate?

> are having a fight which
> distracts from Batman & Robin from
> finding out more. They defeat it, 

Mark: I don't think it's really hard to defeat Cousin Itt.
Neo Vox: Yeah.  All you need are some scissors and clippers.

> and
> find out it's a robot.

Kate: More like there was nothing there.  Everyone knows that Cousin Itt's
      nothing but hair.
R. Jak [Superman]: It's a Gundam! IT'S A GUNDAM!

> The fight is short, but why didn't
> Superman noted that the human was a
> robot. 

Neo Vox: 'Cause he was stupid?
Jonatan: Be nice, Vox.

> Wonder Woman claims he's under
> a "red kryptonite" 

NeoVid [Superman]: And it weighs 80,000 tons!  Get it off me!

>that removed his
> X-ray and heat powers. 

All except NeoVid: (sarcastic) Suuuure.
Mark: The wonders of patented plot devices.
Jonatan: Red kryptonite, solving all your needs!  It slices, it dices, it
         removes part of your powers while you sleep!  Call today, and get
         sent to another dimension as an added bonus!  Operators are 
         stan...mmmmmph!
(R. Jak covers Jonatan's mouth.)
R. Jak: We get the point.
NeoVid: Red K really does do that to his powers.  Thinker pays attention
        to detail.  He'd be a great writer... if he learned a language.

> Later, durning four huaman crimail rob
> a Metroplis lab's comptuer system
> Superman,

Kate: So the computer system has a Superman of its own, and someone robbed
      him?
Neo Vox: No.  You see, it was four pieces of mail converted to crime who
         robbed Superman's bank.
R. Jak: No, it's...(pause) What the hell IS he talking about?

> with Batman, and Flash are on
> see. 

R. Jak: They walk on water.  Cool.

> The battle is quick and the robs
> are defeat. 

Jonatan: And the world is safe once again from the evil Robs.

> Superman claims that they

R. Jak: Had eaten the last of the chocolate ice cream?
Kate: Had left the oven on again?
Mark: Have landed?
Jonatan: Were being effect by something?

> are being effect by something, but he's

(R. Jak and Neo Vox blink at Jonatan.)
Jonatan: (smiles) I'm gooood.
(Kate pulls out a Tonberry card.)
Kate: Don't make me use this.

> too busy to do any about it. Keeping
> Metroplis and the planet safe from evil
> doing is one of his ONE of the BIGGEST
> job.

Mark: Another paragraph brought to you by the Department of Redundancy
      Department.
Jonatan: They're keeping rather busy these days.
NeoVid: I think we can stop with the redundancy jokes now.  We keep
        repeating ourselves and saying the same things twice.
Jonatan: And we're being redundant.

> At the Hall of Justice, they use the
> JUSTIC SCANNER to SCANNER 

Mark: (to NeoVid) Well, since you asked nicely, I'll refrain from saying
      it.

> of any that
> might being controlling their mind.
> They decide to talk to Jor-El II.

R. Jak: Kneeeeel before Zod.

> Jor-El II is the JUSTICE LEAGUE
> comptuer. Jor-El claims that only two
> voices can decode that. SUPERMAN and
> "IT". 

Neo Vox: So they're going to bring in a psychotic circus artist to help
         out?
(Jonatan shivers and looks around the theater.)
Kate: You're all pale.  Are you okay?
Jonatan: Psychotic... circus... artists?
NeoVid: You got an issue with them?
Jonatan: One in particular.
Kate: Sachiko Nishida?
Jonatan: (gives Kate a strange look) She's a paragon of sanity in
         comparison.

> "Who's it?"

R. Jak: (taps Mark on the shoulder) Tag, you're it.

> The next day, a surpizing girl claiming
> to be the cousin of Clark Kent, Linda
> Lee arrives and download all of the
> origin of the Superfriends, 

NeoVid: And is automatically killed by the security system.  The end.

> but has some trouble, 

Mark: Mainly because all the info went to her head.
Kate: Literally.

> decodes the other, revealing a
> Kryptonite rocket ship, and the landing
> of the SUPERGIRL, 

R. Jak: So 'The Supergirl' was the name of the ship...?
Kate [Fujin]: INCOMPREHENSION.
NeoVid [Raijin]: Hey Doc, ya oughtta get yerself a grammar checker, ya
                 know?
Neo Vox [Cid Highwind]: Sit down, shut up, and read your goddamn fic!

> Superman's cousin.
> Finally, Batman figures out that Linda
> Lee is the same girl or "It". 

R. Jak: Make up your mind!  Is it a girl or an it?

> Superman
> appears and tells that Batman got "It".

Jonatan: He'll have to see a doctor about that, then. (notices the
         stares) What?!
Kate [Robin]: Holy contamination, Batman!  You've got cooties!

> "It" happens to be SUPERGIRL. Linda
> Lee removes her costume to show of her
> Supergirl costume. 

Neo Vox: She had on two costumes?  Must not... think...
R. Jak: Mmmmm...short skirted superheroes...
Jonatan: Unfortunately, she forgot that she had put her costume in the
         laundry that day and accidentally flashed everyone.

> Then a transport happen. The Wonder
> Twins 

Jonatan: Said to be the world's most perverted superheroes...
NeoVid: I hear the world's most perverted superhero is Professor X-rated.

>and their monkey, Geek, has
> return from a long vaction. 

Mark: (Grumbles) Not long enough I'm afraid.
Neo Vox: Issues?
Mark: Nah.  I just hate the monkey. ^_^

> The Wonder
> Twin didn't want to mess with the
> Legion of Doom because they are too new
> to the superhero game. 

R. Jak: And they really suck too.
Neo Vox: Issues?
R. Jak: You want the list?
Neo Vox: Guess not.
All [singing]: o/ There is nothing I don't know... about the superhero
                  game... o/

> Supergirl is still young and reveal
> that she got use to Earth's left.

Kate [Supergirl]: You can keep the right, though.  I don't need that.

> They
> is one puzzle left. And that's how
> Supergirl come from Krypton, 

Mark: My guess is that she flew.

> but at
> younger age then SUPERMAN. That's the
> point is story takes a origin bases.
> 
> When a piece of Krytpon, 

NeoVid: Another Japanese Pokemon!
Mark: o/ Gotta catch them all! o/

>the city of
> Argo City,

NeoVid: NO ONE comment on that.
Mark: Hey, I already said I wouldn't. ^_^

> suprizing lived thought the
> doom of the rest of planet didn't know

Kate: (blinks) So they were protected from certain destruction because
       they just didn't know that THE PLANET EXPLODED?
NeoVid: Ignorance is bliss.

> suprized. Argo City was aslo home of
> Zor-El and Allura, 

Neo Vox: Hey!  A Voltron crossover!

>who married and had
> one daughter, Kara Zor-El. Lucky, the
> dome was a lead/glass combine, 

R. Jak: They're communists, then?

> which
> keep them from being effect by strange
> gold, red, and green item.

Kate: So... what was this strange gold, red and green item they had to be
      protected from?
NeoVid: Maybe it was her uncle.

> But Zor-El
> assume that it would cuase problem, if
> they for them in their is a yellow sun.
> Lucky, the after-quakes start to happen,
> and a lot worse then the more Krypton

Neo Vox: Yes!  Thank goodness for those life-threatening earthquakes!

> quakes. Lucky, Allura had made a
> costume and teach Kara englsh, 

Kate: Because they knew she'd end up in an English-speaking country when
      they sent her to Earth.
R. Jak [Allura]: I wish to see a menu.
Mark [Kara]: I...weesh to see...a menu.

> while
> Zor-El worked on the rocket ship.

Jonatan: o/ The rocket ship is being filled...
            with a thousand girls and a thousand thrills... o/

> Then
> the rocketship was lauch as Argo City
> want to join with Krypton in universe
> heaven.

Neo Vox: Where all the universes go when they die.

> 
> Supergirl landed. Superman had give her
> to a orphan while he tried to keep
> Supergirl sercet.

NeoVid [Orphan]: Look, sir... I'm having enough trouble surviving on my
                 own. I can't take care of a kid as well.
Mark [Superman]: Damn!  Now who can I leave her with?  I know!  I'll ask
                 that crippled homeless guy!
Jonatan [Crippled Homeless Guy]: Go away, Supes!  You already left me with
                                 that Vietnamese refugee family a week ago!

> Superman thought a few
> weeks ago, to give a 10th anniversy
> puzzle for the SUPERFRIENDS and a new
> friend. SUPERGIRL!!!
> ######################THE END########### 

All: Yaaayy!!!
Mark: Wait a minute!  Why is there no Green Lantern?!?  I feel ripped off!
R. Jak: Don't feel too bad.  They didn't have Firestorm or Apache Chief in
        there, either.
Jonatan: (wipes away a tear)  Man, that Doc Thinker... he's still got it,
         all right.
NeoVid: Whatever he's got, I hope I won't catch it.  (rimshot)
Kate: Let's scoot.

*/\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\*

	The Roasters had exited the Theater of Pain.  They seemed to be a
bit woozy but undamaged.  R. Jak looked particularly troubled, though.
	"Well, that was a pleasant change," Jonatan said pleasantly.
"Thinker always has that untouchable... good quality, don't you think?"
	"You're drunk again, aren't you?" Mark asked.
	Jonatan shook his head. "Not so, my foreigner friend.  I'm
totally sober.  Not much to get brain damaged about anyway."
	Kate turned to the new guys. "So," she asked, smiling, "your
reaction?"
	"Very pleasurable," Neo Vox replied.
	"Yes.  Me too for me.  Had losta fun," R. Jak replied, then
stopped.  The group stared at Jak.
	"Hey, you okay, New Guy?" Jonatan asked.
	"Uh, I tink so."  R. Jak cleared his throat, then his eyes grew
wide. "Gods!  I like spek Thinker takl!  Hawribel!" 
	"...whoa," Jonatan said.  "This is kinda bad, isn't it?"
	"What's the cure?" asked NeoVid.
	"Either a good story of any series or a few MiSTing of the Doc's
other works.  However, the former is harder to find," replied Jonatan. "I
think."
	"I don' tsee anyhting worong,Bua if theif a care, I pake it,"
NeoVid noted.  "Butter, let's chec k in ont he almost-bad guy, four rig
htnow."
	Ranma X appeared on the monitors.
	"Hah!  Success!  Now I need to get Woofer here and I will be set!
Soon, all will feel the wrath of RNamrXA!  Will you face hooror of ficfan
for..."  He paused.  "huh? wtah guninhg on hree? On! on! I Tinker spek
twoo!! Noe!! Noe!!"
	"Looks like your handiwork backfired, Ran," commented Mark.
	"Well, there goes all the grammar skills!" NeoVox laughed.
	Ranma X grabbed an Ayn Rand novel and read the first three pages
of it.  He sighed and remarked, "Dianteics?  Hah!  That one for
objectivism!  If it can counter thinker, It can counter anything!
Anyways, now that you little people have been made an example of, you can
go, except for uh...Neo..Vid..Puu?....uh..?"
	"Vox.  Neo Vox.  And what is that thing, 'Dianteics?'" asked
NeoVox.
	"Good reading." replied Mark.
	"Oh.  Right... you and that Jak guy."
	"huh? whyt do I haev to?" Jak replied indignatly.
	"'Cause you need to learn what suffering is, bonehead.  As for the
rest of you, the secretary has some coupons for free pizza."
	"You think you can take away the pain of going through that fic
just by giving us some free pizza?" Mark asked.
	"Of course." replied Ramna X.
	"Cool!  Pizza!" NeoVid said cheerily in non-Thinkerese.
	"Sure.  Don't support me or anything..." Mark grunted.
	"I won than." replied NeoVid.
	Ranma X sneered. "Okay, don't take them then--"
	"Hey, I didn't say I won't take them!"  Mark grabbed the coupons
from the secretary who just entered.  He looked at them and passed them
to the others.
	Ranma X continued, "Well, now that we're all happy, I'd ask you
to--"
	"Hey, these coupons expire tomorrow!" Mark interrupted. 
	Ranma X grinned again. "Then I guess you guys better use them
soon."  He laughed.
	"I'm a quick eater.  I wouldn't worry about this coupon
expiring... if I had one." Neo Vox commented, looking over NeoVid's
shoulder.  "You gonna use that?"
	"Yes," NeoVid snatched it away from Vox's glance. 
	"I hungry," Jak noted. "Where you get popcorn around here?"
	"I think I now we can said on Doc's fic. He's needs a speller
checker, grammer checker, and army of prereaders," stated NeoVid.
	"Annon." laughed Neo Vox.
	"WHAT did you say?!" a definitely feminine voice shouted from
behind the group.
	Everyone turned to see Kate and Jonatan apparently arguing.  Kate
looked rather upset.
	"Look," Jonatan said, "I just meant--"
	"_No one_ insults Irvine-sama and gets away with it!"
	"Oh, puh-leeze."  The Swedish author rolled his eyes.  "The poor
schmuck gets used for comedy relief, and he's too chicken to cap Edea
properly, and then--"
	"Aw, c'mon," NeoVid started.  "What's wrong with comic relief?
Laguna's my favorite character anyway.  And Irvine's kinda cool... but
yknow, in the ending, he sorta reminded me of... a Muppet... somehow..."
	"MUPPET?!"  Everyone else decided to back away when a battle aura
worthy of any saiyajin sprang up around Kate. "THAT!  DOES!  IT!  Tonberry,
I CHOOSE YOU!"  With the deft movements of an expert, she produced her deck
and held up one of the cards.
	The lights dimmed and, despite being indoors, rain started to
fall, forming puddles on the floor.
	"I don't remember this from Tonberry's animation..." Jonatan mused.
	Kate frantically waved the card. "Wait!  Stop!  Return!"
	"I doy't thinker thet wall walk." stated R. Jak.
	A rider on a six-legged horse landed in front of Jonatan.  It
looked at him through its helmet and raised the wicked polearm it held.
	"Oh, crap..." Kate muttered.
	"Jonatan, look out!" NeoVid shouted while looking for cover. "Does
that look like Tonberry? It's--"
	*ZAN!*
	*TETSU!*
	*KEN!*
	"--Odin," NeoVid finished as Jonatan fell apart, not in a
metaphorical way.
	"This men are seriously hurt," R. Jak noted. 
	Kate looked down on the mess and sweatdropped. "Um... sorry?  I
really just meant to use Tonberry..."
	"Blrgf..." Jonatan commented, not being in good shape to talk.
	"Argh..." She clutched her head, sweatdropping profusely. "I
really have to fix this... I'll just take you to the cloning facility near
my house, okay?"  Not getting a response from the minced-meat MSTier, she
snagged a sack from the corner of the room and quickly filled it with the
little itty bitty pieces. 
	"uhhhh.... Kate?" NeoVid squeaked from where Odin was facing him
down.  Odin's horse reared up and lunged...
	...NeoVid whipped a Gunblade out of his jacket pocket...
	*ShuRIPPP *
	...And the two halves of Odin hit the ground behind him with a
thud.
	NeoVid looked for missing parts of his body and couldn't find any.
"Wow... I didn't think that'd work..."
	Kate stared.  Then an industrial-size battle aura flared up. "HEY!
THAT WAS ONE OF MY BEST CARDS!"
	"Aiiigghhh!!  I'm sorry!  I'm sorry!  I didn't think I could
actually do it!" NeoVid frantically yelled back as she chased him out,
swinging the Sack-O-Jonatan.  Mark sighed and followed the two of them.
	Neo Vox looked at Ranma X's image on the monitor.
	"Why did you ask us to stay behind?"
	"No reason really, except..." Ranma X pressed the button which
caused a set of klaxons and lights to turn on.
	However, it occured on Ranma X's side of the monitor, causing him
to be thrown into the theater to read today's fic.
	"Is there no justice?!!  The world is a dark and lonely-OWW!"
Ranma X yelled to the sky, only to be hit by one of the theater doors.
	"There ain't no justice alright... For us!" Neo Vox yelled.
	"Good riddance, you spoony bard!" R. Jak replied. 
	Neo Vox said to R. Jak, "Let's get outta here."
	"Yeha. Teehs gies are twoo wiered.." R. Jak said as he pondered
getting a copy of "The Fowntaenhed"

*/\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\*

############ A few weeks later###############

	W4 was walking in the theater. 
	"My plan was pure genius!" he declared, tapping what looked like a
blue plastic gun.  "Using this Evil Ray, I used Ranma X's desire for
vengeance to do my dirty work.  That Thinker story could ruins anyone's
brains, including mine.  And now, he's been reading nothing but the same
Thinker fic for weeks now!  This test was a complete success!  NYAR HAR
HAR HAR HAR!"
	Ramna X stood up. "Tyme four my reveeged two beaned completed."
	W4 turned around and looked at the red-eyed, very-armed and very
close Ranma X.  "Well, shit," W4 cursed.
	Ramna X talked like Akane, beat W4 over the head several times
like Akane, kicked W4 into the ceiling like Akane and walked out.
	"Y'know," W4 mused while trying to pry himself off of the ceiling.
"I totally forgot that he'd hit me.  Either he's good or evil."
	W4 hit the floor with a resounding thud.
	"He's... neither," he mumbled.  "He's... SCREWED."

*/\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\* */\*

Authors' notes:

Jonatan Streith

Another MSTing done, and I ended up getting hacked in little pieces.
Awesome. ^_^ (You're worried about me, Kate-chan? I am, too.) Say hi to
New Guys R. Jak and Neo Vox.  What to say about the fic?  It's Thinker,
plain and simple.  And I'm honored to have MSTied his work.  I do believe
that we did hit a very high number of good riffs, despite the fic's
shortness.  More respect to The Incomprehensible One.  And also... a last
big thanks to my fellow MSTiers, without whom this MSTing would have been
a lot less interesting. You guys Da Bomb, mon. ^_^

Kate Malloy

Woo-hoo! Another successful MSTing! I'm so lucky; my second one ever and I
got to do a story by the legendary Dr. Thinker!

Thanks to W4 for starting up the whole idea in the first place, Ranma X
for being our volunteer villain, Dr. Thinker himself for being a good
sport (and the Odin suggestion), and Jonatan for allowing me to make
kibble out of him. ^_^  (But, y'know, Jonatan, you seemed rather eager to
do it, actually...I'm kinda worried about you. ^_~)

(Editor's note: No comment.  ^_^)

Until next time! And remember... 
"I'm not a horribly violent person; I just play one on MSTings."

Mark Poa

Wai! Fun! I didn't know what was all the fuss about that Thinker guy, but
I enjoyed this Roasting session immensely. ^_^ I did more riffs here than
I did in the other two I joined in (I think).  I am still disappointed that
there wasn't any Green Lantern in it, though. *Almost gets flattened by
tons of thrown garbage* Okay, okay, enough with that joke.  I'll probably
skip the next two riffings.  However, I will be back for my chance at
villainy.  (I did say "probably skip", right? ^_~)

Send comments to me at my addy recklessflyer@mechpilot.com. I welcome all
email. Well, except junkmail... and flames... and advertisements... and
chain letters... ^_^

Okay, I'll shut up now. ^_^

NeoVid 

Yay, another person I can be confused with.  ^_^  Boy, I've been a MSTer
for a while now, and I never thought I'd get a chance at Thinker.  Ah,
I've arrived...  This was a fun fic to do, partly because it wasn't much
work.  Any IFRoast with Thinker, I'll take a shot at... for now at least.
Ysee, my writing time's going to be shortened a lot soon... sigh. Well,
I'm still at neovid@hotmail.com if you've got comments and are actually
willing to mail one of the people in a groupMST this big. ^_^

(Editor's note: I'm bummed to hear that we'll be seeing less of him.  But
 on the bright side, he's less likely to go and break our fingers. ^_^;)

Neo Vox

(looks down at Jonatan's comments) I'm not of the treachcoat league.
Especially after Columbine, I'm not.

Well, that was painless.  I liked doing this Roast.  Made some good lines.
The Thinkerese was strangely understandable.  BTW, Vanilla and Chocolate
are from an online comic called "Freakn'" whivch you can find on the
Online Comic Artist Directory.

(Editor's note: To look for OCAD, try this URL: http://ocad.syste.ms/ )

Ranma X

Yoinks. I had to say this was very nice, but the evil bit is a hard act to
follow W4 in.  I'm happy if the Roasters don't kill me and I'll be around
MiSTing a few more things before I become evil again.

Still it was fun being the "Dr. Pepper" of evil.

Anyways, I have to go now and write stories of Hentai alternate universes
and the shoujou-esque drama tht ensues (with a few tentacles along the way.)

R. Jak

Well, I'd like to comment on this story, but first I'd like to say this to
Lord Thinker: Thank you for making us laugh, although we laugh at the
wrong parts, and people never really appreciate your stories.  Thank you
for being a good sport about all this.  May you continue to inspire us
all.  HAIL D.T!  May his star never stop shining.

On the fic.  I liked it.  Course, I'm going to Japan next week, so I'll
have to take a bit of a hiatus.  But rest assured, you haven't seen the
last of RJ yet. 

(Editor's note: He speaks the truth.  I just hope he brings back enough
 pocky for all of us. 8)  )

Myau flaps his wings ploudly, crew! Signing off. 

SERCET WORKER

(Looks above to Ramna X's notes) More like an "One" then "Dr. Pepper"
version of W4.  Anywhy, I like the riffing to they did to my story.  Yep.
I'm the author of that story.  I like to laugh.  That why I keep up the
stupidfully stories.  BWAH BWAH BWAH BWAH BWAH BWAH BWAHH.  I aslo fix
parts of this ending, including give a Thinkerse Ramna X a change to harm
W4.

W4

Let me go on record as saying, "Woo hoo!"

We got both IFR vets (Jonatan, Kate and Mark) and IFR/MiST vets (NeoVid),
and that was good.

And we got two new IFR volunteers who are also MiST vets (Neo Vox and
Ripper Jak), and that was good, too.

And we've got the attention of Dr. Thinker, who is a treasure for MiSTers,
not so because of his works but because of his great attitude.  And that's
quite good. 8)

At the risk of sounding pompous, we're getting on the map, bay-bee! >8D

But seriously, I'm pleased to see how this is turning out, not so much
because of the MiSTs we produce, but because people are getting together
and having fun.  To me, it feels like watching TV with a group of pals. 8)

One last note.  Eric Harsh, a fellow MiSTer, did a Mike-and-the-Bots
MiSTing of this fic.  If you want to check it out, it's at SVAM on the
"Usual Suspects" Page.  (The URL to SVAM is
http://www.lefty.simplenet.com/svam/index.html).

One last URL to consider.
-http://www.students.rhodes.edu/%7Eknoke/indie/indie.html
(Indie Madnesse, the home of ImproFicRoast)

Questions?  Comments?  Statements?  Inquiries?  Things you want to know?
Send me your thoughts and c&c to indiemadw4@home.com

> The battle is quick and the robs
> are defeat.