Latveria, home of Doctor Doom... Inside Doom's castle, his young protege Dong Hwan slept like a baby. It was a tiring day of learning how to use sorcery to blow up gophers, but Dong was a quick learner in that. A blissful look of peace stayed on his face until a mysterious voice woke him up. "Wake up, Dong Hwan..." Dong's eyes opened and he sat up. He stared out the window and noticed that outside, in a field, a purple figure stood in the darkness. It was too dark to see who it was and Dong's eyes were extremely blurry from just waking up. "Come down here, Dong Hwan..." the voice insisted. Following the words, Dong got up and shambled out his door. It took about a half hour for him to find his way through the castle, but eventually he found his way outside. Still in a stupor, Dong looked across the field and saw him. It was some kind of demon bug man thing. His eyes glowed green and his bare jaw almost looked like a smile. He told Dong Hwan, "Twenty-eight days... six hours... forty-two minutes... twelve seconds. That... is when Blackheart... will come..." "Why?" Dong asked. Sleepy and almost hypnotized, he had a blissful, child-like grin on his face. "To make South Town his domain..." Dong was too out of it to be concerned. "What's your name?" "My name... is Yoshimitsu..." "That's a silly name," Dong laughed. "My name is Kim Dong Hwan." "Yes... I know that..." "I live in a castle now." Yoshimitsu nodded. "I know that too... I mean, I did come here..." There was a long, uncomfortable silence. "Listen..." Yoshimitsu said, "I've got another appointment... I'll talk to you later..." "Okay, Mr. Bug Man." "That's Yoshimitsu..." "Oh. I thought that was your first name." "Huh?" Dong weakly shrugged. "Yoshimitsu Bug Man." "Just go back to sleep..." Yoshimitsu spun around and vanished into thin air. Dong Hwan, on the other hand, fell over in the field and passed out. [---] Hours past. "Wake up, you fool." Dong's eyes opened again. "Bug Man?" Dr. Doom crossed his arms. "Doom is most certainly not a 'bug man'! Explain yourself." "Not now, man. I'm tired." Doom rubbed his chin. "As strange as this behavior is, whatever occurred is in fact a blessing." "What do you mean?" Dong slowly got to his feet and stretched his back. "Your room had been salvaged last night. By Garuda." "Did he touch my REO Speedwagon poster?" "I did not check. But your bed is nothing but a set of scraps now, boy." "He's gone though, right?" Doom nodded. "Yes. Strange as I ponder it. Garuda is driven to your essence. He should have smelled you out here." "So why didn't he? I haven't bathed since three days ago. And even then, it wasn't in water." Disgusted, Doom decided not to inquire more. "Just get inside." [---] Somewhere else, Garuda coughed up a wad of mucus. It blew his nose and tossed the used tissue into what seemed like an endless trail of snotty tissues. Working for Hell had its perks, but they didn't have sick days. [---] FORGOT ABOUT JAE Chapter 46: Free as a Bird Story spread over your toast by Shelby Scott, "The Darkheart One" Chapter used to clean your car by Gavin "Gavok" Jasper [---] Last time on Forgot About Jae: - Sharon got her ass kicked fairly quickly and badly. - Rock Howard and Jae Hoon have patched things up. ...Or have they? - Yes, they have. - Marco Rodriguez won the election against Heihachi Mishima. ...Or did he? - Yes, he did. - Hey, I just found a quarter! ...Or did I? - Nope. Shit, it's a nickel. [---] Mayor Marco Rodriguez waved to his public, prepared to make his first speech since re-election. On his left was Vice Mayor Ryou Szakakazi and to his right was somebody with a sheet over his or her person. "Thank you everybody for coming here today! Sorry I wasn't here earlier, but I had to go see that my opponent Heihachi Mishima and his henchmen has been put behind bars. Unfortunately there is no word on the whereabouts of SCABS' commander, who goes by the name of Sharon. Now, then. Are there any questions you reporters would like to ask?" One of them raised his hand. "Bishamon, Undead Times. What are your plans on the crisis with--" "What was that?" the Mayor interrupted. "You were asking what's underneath this sheet?" "Actually, I was wondering--" "I'll tell you what's under here! The answer to all of South Town's crime problems! No more will I have to spend so much of the budget on mercenaries and the like. So ladies and gentlemen, I would like to introduce you to South Town's official superhero..." He pulled the sheet. "Skullomania!" "Hiya!" he said, looking in the wrong direction. A random reporter raised her hand. "Yes," Marco said, acknowleding her. "Um... why are you doing this? I mean why... *him*?" "Simple. Unlike most other heroes, my boy here is unkillable. Plus he works for three dollars an hour!" "Unkillable?!" another reporter exclaimed. "Exactly. Check this out." Marco pulled out a gun and shot Skullomania in the head at point-blank range. His brains splattered over one of the cameras. The crowd gasped. Then a bus stopped about half a block from the podium. The door opened and Skullomania rushed out of it. He bolted back to the mayor and panted. "Sorry... I'm late..." Rodriguez nodded. "Thank you. I have an appointment, but my Vice Mayor here can answer any of your questions." Ryou looked left to right several times before exclaiming, "Uhhh, gophers is a girl's best friend!" [---] "Turn that shit off," Cracker Jack commanded. The Driver did so. "Ungrateful son of a bitch. After all we did for him, he stabs us in the back." Poison asked, "Are you talking about Mayor Butt or Skullo?" "Eh... both. That's going to affect business, you know. It's a shame I just spent all that money earlier today." "On what?" "Well, you know how we have Sharon locked up in the torture chamber and I said how I wanted to punish her for turning on us?" Poison and The Driver nodded. "Well, I hired some guys to tear away at her sanity for a while." [---] A couple floors underneath... o/~ Oh we are the Battlertoads we always dance around! Caring for each other as we hop right through South Town! If you're ever need to see us then there's no reason to frown! We are the Battlertoads we always dance around! o/~ Sharon screamed for a quick death. [---] Back upstairs... "Again, thanks for everything, Jae," Rock Howard said with a smile. "Hey, it's the least I can do. It's just messed up that all of that garbage had to happen. I'm surprised that Cracker Jack would even give you a job here. Remember that time you had the Ultimate Ensemble and you took him out?" Rock scratched the back of his head. "Heh. Not so loud, he might hear us." Jae felt a tap on his shoulder. Turning around, he noticed Angel wearing only a matching white set of scant underwear. She handed Jae a few dollar bills. "Jae, can you do me a favor and hold this for me?" "Uh... Angel! What happened to that dobok I gave you?" Jae put his hand over Rock's eyes. "Fuuma and I had a bet of whether or not the paper shredder could shred clothes. So I had it shred the top half of the outfit and won five bucks!" Jae looked down. "Then what happened the bottom half?" "Double or nothing." Jae sighed and walked away with his girlfriend. "Let's go to the storage closet. I think I saw a sandwich board in there once." Rock just shook his head. "Either Fuuma is the stupidest man ever or the smartest man ever." CJ walked over in a hurry. "All right, everybody! We got an assignment!" "What is it?" Fuuma asked. "King the bartender called from the Pao Pao Cafe. It seems Chris is there." "So... what's he doing that's so horrible?" CJ cracked his knuckles. "He's being Chris." "Ohhhhhh! Shotgun!" CJ sized up Rock. "Where are Jae and Angel?" "Jae went to go get Angel some clothes, sir." "Gotcha. Fuuma, go get them and have tell them to meet us outside!" CJ turned back to Rock. "Now, I don't like you, Howard. But today's your first day of duty. Are you ready for it?" "Yes, sir," Rock said enthusiastically. "Great!" CJ handed Rock a mop. "Now go clean the floors. Hugo's in the can right now, so it'll probably reek when he gets out. Cleaning that should be a two day job. Now get to work!" Rock nodded and went to work. Whistling to himself, he knew that he was going to be the best janitor ever. [---] Within his mansion, Brian Battler shut off his TV and sighed. Skullomania over him? What a load. At the time, the only solace he could take was in a warming bottle of beer. It was a very bad week. Moe Habana, once known as Battler Girl, walked past him with her bags. "I'm leaving this place, Brian. Goodbye, you creep." After hearing the door slam, Brian just stared forward and said, "That's nice." His butler Richard Meyer stood at his side. "I'm sure she'll be back, sir." "It doesn't matter, Richard. I've made a decision." "You're going to rehab?" "Hell no. No, I've decided that it's time I hang it up. Nobody cares about Battler Man these days. Nobody wants me around. All they care about is that unkillable skeleton guy. Consider Battler Man retired." He took another swig. "Sir, are you sure about this?" "Very, Richard. After what happened to Bao, I... I..." Brian started crying into his hands, causing the bottle to fall to the floor and shatter. "Why did this have to happen? Why, Richard?" The butler merely patted him on the back. Now you might think that Battler's sad about Bao dying. Yeah, you should be so lucky. It turns out he's just broken up about Bao Wonder hanging out with the wrong crowd. [---] In a building shaped like a Y... Bao Wonder stood before a group made up of Lilith Aensland, Anita, Maxima and what's-his-name from Alter Beast. "Let this meeting of the Youth Warriors begin! WAI!" "WAI!" Lilith yelled. "Mou," Anita groaned. The Alter Beast Boy's eyes started swirling. "KAWAII!" Maxima yelled. A sweat drop appeared on Anita's scalp. Then a vein on her head started pulsing. Lilith transformed into a chibi version of herself and cowered back. "WAI!" Bao piped. It went on like that for about two hours. [---] Rugal Bernstein watched the Youth Warriors from within a poorly lit room. A red eye glowed from his overly shadowed face. "You will fall to my power, Youth Warriors. I will see to th-- OW! FUCK! I stubbed my toe! Goddammit! When are we going to fix the lights in here?" [---] "Idiots!" Quan Chi yelled, smacking both Moloch and Drahmin with one swing of his arm. "You've ruined everything!" "We sorry," Moloch said sadly. "You're sorry?! Ignorant beasts! I should send you back to the fifth layer of Hell where I found you jokes!" Quan Chi turned away and paced. "Now that Jae Hoon and Rock Howard are friends again, it puts a damper on my plan." "But you no have plan," Drahmin stated. "SHUT! UP!" Quan Chi almost threw out his voice. He calmed down and took a couple deep breaths. "It's okay, though. It means it's time to move on to Plan C." "Plan C?" the two Oni asked. "Yes, Plan C." Quan Chi walked over to a large man wearing a sheet over his entire body. "Gentlemen, I would like to introduce you to the answer to all our problems." He pulled the sheet, revealing a man looking like Skullomania, only larger and evil looking. "Meet Shadowgeist!" [---] Dr. Doom and Dong Hwan returned to South Town. Doom thought it was a good idea since Garuda was likely still rummaging through their stuff in Latveria. Dong thought it was a good idea because in his opinion, Latveria was boring as Hell. Just a bunch of farmers worshipping him. The novelty gets old after a while. That must have been why Doom's always trying to rule the world, or at least other countries that *aren't* shitty third world holes-in-the-ground. The two of them decided to take a look at the latest Johnny Cage movie, "Fist in Your Face 3: Payback Time". Of course, it was all Dong's idea. Doom just wanted to get off his feet. In fact, only ten minutes into the movie, Doom fell into a deep sleep. It was just Dong, eating his popcorn, watching the movie alone. Though he wasn't alone for long. He thought he heard someone drink from a soda. Noticing that Doom's bulky armor was blocking his view, Dong bent forward and looked to see who it was. Yoshimitsu slowly turned his head to acknowledge Dong. He looked forward to the screen again. Dong's face returned to the child-like, sleepy smile of their first meeting. "It's you again." "Yes, it is..." Dong was able to get a better look at Yoshimitsu and his odd appearance. "Why are you wearing that stupid bug suit?" Yoshimitsu simply responded with, "Why are you wearing that stupid human suit...?" "That's... uh, that doesn't really answer my question." As Yoshimitsu ignored Dong and reached for his cup, his right hand started twirling at the wrist. It was obviously some kind of fake, cybernetic hand. Despite his odd state of mind, Dong was a little freaked out by it. "What happened to your hand?" Yoshimitsu turned to him and in a sad, yet cryptic tone, told him, "I'm so sorry..." Dong became confused and frustrated with this conversation. "Yoshi, when's this gonna end?" "You should already know that..." Dong then remembered what Yoshimitsu said about Blackheart earlier. He didn't know what that meant, exactly. He could've sworn he heard his mentor mention that name once or twice, yet he just couldn't put a face to the name. Not that Blackheart had much of a face. Before Dong could ask about Blackheart, Yoshimitsu pointed to the screen. "Ever seen a portal...?" The image of Johnny Cage punching out a clown rippled and tore open, revealing a wormhole. On the other side was Kusanagi Tower. "Burn it..." Yoshimitsu instructed. "I don't know about this, Yoshi." "I saved your life, Dong Hwan... Burn it down..." Dong Hwan stood up and slowly shambled up the aisle. While he left, Yoshimitsu palmed his face. "I opened that portal for a reason, numbnuts... Oh, forget it..." He reached over Doom and stole Dong's popcorn, while watching the rest of the movie. "I like this movie... I like it goooooood..." [---] "He's got a gun... I think!" a bank teller yelled. The Smoker shot him in the arm with the Emperor. "Aw, shit! Yeah, he's definately got a gun!" "Nobody moves, nobody gets smoked," the criminal laughed. Then coughed. Then he tossed one of the tellers a sack. "Fill this up with cash, pronto!" The Smoker was going to see to it that Mariah Net would get the best birthday present that money could buy. In fact, that's why he went alone on this job rather than bring her along. In the corner of his eye, he caught the football logo of Battler Man on a television monitor. He pointed the Emperor to one of the hostages. "Turn it up," he demanded. The hostage did what he said and turned up the program. It was in fact a newscast about Battler Man's recent decision. "--ttler Man, whose vigilante acts have aided South Town against crime every once and a while, will be missed by... I don't know... somebody, I'm sure. Personally, I don't give a rat's ass. I guess it's just a slow news day." The Smoker gasped. "W-what? *cough*" "Once again: Battler Man has retired. Now it's time for the weather." The Smoker blasted the monitor and stood still, trying to take in this information. Battler Man? Retired? He should have been ecstatic, but yet... he felt so empty. He spat out his cigarette and put it out with his right foot. The Emperor disappeared from his hand and he just stared at nothing. He was basically catatonic. Just then, the door opened, revealing the mighty Skullomania. He hopped onto a surprised hostage's shoulders, soared into the air, rolled into a ball and bounced off of Smoker's head. The Smoker fell to his back and his hat landed right over his face. "No need for thank yous, people! It's all in a day's work for Skullomania!" He put the Smoker over his shoulder and ran to deliver him to the police. [---] "Just yesterday I saw E. Honda sneeze and have one of Goro's arms fly out of his nose!" "E. Honda shot Liberty Vallance!" "He makes fruit smoothies with human adrenaline!" "He's the Blair Witch!" "E. Honda went as Pittsburgh for Halloween!" "The sounds of his flab smacking against itself has caused the destruction of countless Clappers!" "He writes love letters to Ridley!" "He thinks King Hippo's anorexic!" "Every fortune cookie he's ever eaten said the same thing: 'Sweet Jesus, not you again!'" "He invented the sandwich, but wanted to save his namesake for a car company!" "Lifeforce is actually about a mission into E. Honda's digestive tract!" "When E. Honda gets out of bed, he makes the Transformers noise!" "When Rogue touched E. Honda, she had an instant, massive heart attack!" "TO E. HONDA!" In another section of the bar sat former professional wrestler and famous talk-show host Kin Korn Karn. With him was his son, the rarely-thought-about Mortal Kombat character Hsu Hao. A member of the elusive Red Dragon, Hsu Hao was the splitting image of his father, except for the huge red, glowing heart sticking out of his chest that acted as both a laser canon and a breast-plate. "Father! I need the car keys tomorrow night!" "Absolutely not!" Karn yelled. "But! I do have! VERY IMPORTANT DATE!" "You may have very important date, BUT! You do not have! Well paying job!" Guile took a break from drinking and praising his personal messiah to heckle Hsu Hao. "Ha! What are you, like thirty? And you still live with your dad?" "Quiet!" Hsu Hao yelled. "What, are you going to tell your daddy what I said?" Hsu Hao stood up and narrowed his eyes. "Your crack is making me angry. AND! You would not like me! WHEN I'M ANGRY!" "What a joke!" Guile laughed. The others in the bar laughed with him and at Hsu Hao. "No! Quiet! All of you! You don't realize what you're doing! You-- AH!" He collapsed to the floor. He slowly rose to his feet. His pantlegs tore. His skin became green and scaly. His eyes became filled with fury. Spikes appeared from his forehead. His glowing chest thing... stayed the same. He was no longer Hsu Hao Karn. Now he was... The Incredible Necrid! "HOOSHARIS!!" he yelled. "What did he say?" Guile asked. "I think he said 'Necrid mad,'" Rainbow Mika offered. Guile put his drink down and stood up. "Okay, let's get this over with." From outside, people could hear the bone-crunching sounds of a beat down and even saw some blood splatter against the wall. Finally, the window shattered and Necrid hit the pavement head-first. "GREUSHINTS!!" he cried in pain. Then he returned to his form of Hsu Hao. "And stay out!" Seth yelled from inside. Hsu Hao got back up and walked backwards, down the sidewalk. Sad piano music played as the Mongolian warrior attempted to hitchhike away. [---] Armor King looked over the resume. "Hm. Everything seems in order here. Do you have any references?" Kintaro fidgeted with his pen. "Uh... hm... Shao Kahn, Gorbak: King of the Shokan, um... Shang knows me pretty well. Oh, and Scorpion and I used to be President and Vice President of the Corey Feldman Fan Club." "Well, we definately do have a job opening ever since the other day when your friend Goro was decapitated by E. Honda's right nostril. But I'm not sure if you're the kind of Shokan we're looking for." Kintaro stood out of his chair, roared and got in Armor King's face. "IF I DON'T GET THIS JOB, I'M GOING TO STOMP YOUR BONES INTO DUST, MASKED MAN!! ROAR!!" Armor King blinked his one eye. "Whoa. When can you start?" "Whenever you need. But I need the weekends off." "How come?" "I'm part of a big brother program." [---] Young Calvin munched on a cookie with a second one in his right hand. In his left he held onto the plush doll of his best friend Hobbes. "Dad, can my tiger friend have a cookie too?" His father smirked. "Calvin, I already gave Hobbes a cookie." "But I mean my other tiger friend!" "Calvin, your mother and I have had enough of this nonsense. You need to grow up and realize that--" Kintaro jumped down through the roof and landed in front of Calvin's dad. "I WANT A COOKIE AND I WANT IT NOOOOOOOOOOOOOW!!" Calvin's dad's glasses flew across the room right before he passed out. "That was great!" Calvin laughed. "Hey, can you do that stomping thing to Suzy's doll house?" [---] Armor King nodded. "Done and done. Welcome aboard, Kintaro." "Nice to be a part of the team." Kintaro paused and started sniffing. "Do... do you smell smoke?" [---] "Bash... will... break you..." The masked boxer/criminal leaned forward, completely exhausted. With a loud yell, he uppercutted Skullomania so hard that he broke the poor guy's neck and killed him. But then Skullomania popped up from a nearby manhole and tapped the steroid-powered villain on the shoulder. Bash weakly turned around and groaned. "Looking for me, punchy?" Bash raised his fist once more, but that was all he had the strength to do. His arms fell limp and his neck lost the power to hold up his head. Skullo winded up his fist and almost broke his knuckles over Bash's cranium. Bash fell back and fell asleep. Skullomania powerposed while the media took photos. "That will teach you to litter while jaywalking and wearing white shoes after Labor Day!" [---] "Hello, we are Venom and welcome back to the Brock Group. For those of you just joining us, our topic is 'Space Alien Civil Rights'. We have only two guests today, Mad Dog, the commando with thirty lives who defeated the viscious Red Falcon, and Glacius, the frosty extra-terrestrial from outer space." Venom turned to Mad Dog. "Now Mad Dog, before the break you said that you think all bastard aliens should be nuked to Hell. Do you have anything more to add?" Staring off, Mad Dog explained, "Yes. I was wrong. Aliens are my friends. Aliens are good. I was wrong to disagree." "Great!" Venom exclaimed. Glacius sighed. "Some debate show." "What?" Venom asked, defensively. "During the break you *ate* the part of his brain that hates aliens." "Shut up, snowcone." "Anyway," Glacius continued, "on an unrelated note, I'd like to congratulate you, Mr. Brock." "Huh?" "Well, I heard that yesterday you came back from your honeymoon with Morrigan Aensland." Venom stared back at him, not sure how to respond. "Well, you two did get married, didn't you? I see your wedding ring over your costume." Venom tilted his head. "Well... yes and no. You see, there *was* a marriage..." [---] In a hotel suite, Eddie Brock and Morrigan Aensland sat on opposite sides of a coffee table, playing cards. Eddie was wearing only a bulky bathrobe while Morrigan was clad in only a small white towel. "Do you have any twos?" Morrigan asked, bored. "Go fish," Eddie sighed. On the door to the next room, a sign hung on the knob saying, "Do not disturb." From behind it, the sounds of otherworldy screeching echoed into Eddie and Morrigan's room. Eddie shook his head. "They're still going at it." Morrigan sorted her cards. "How does a glob of living black liquid have sex with a shapeshifting group of bats?" "I... don't want to think about it." [---] Glacius blinked. "Can you eat the part of my brain that remembers this anecdote?" "Nah, we would probably get a headrush. But man, that was just boring. I mean, how much can you do with a naked, well endowed succubus in a hotel room?" Mad Dog stared at Venom in shock. Glacius smacked himself on on forehead. "What?" Venom asked. Then it set in. With a stunned look on their face, they stood up, walked to the wall, mentally retracted the symbiote mask and Eddie repeatedly rammed his head into the wall. "STUPID! STUPID! STUPID! STUPID! STUPID!" He took a deep breath and got his bearings. "Okay, then. That's about all the time we have on the Brock Group. Join us tomorrow when our topic will be 'Fire vs. Sonics' with guests Banshee, Sindel, Heat Man and Cinder. Until next time, we are Ven... wait." They reread the cue card. "WHAT?! Whose behind this?!" [---] Somewhere else, Spider-Man snickered uncontrollably while putting away a black marker. [---] Pepe, the Jae Hoon lookalike, raced into an alley to evade the futuristic, gasmask-wearing ninjas Mezu and Gozu. "I think he went that way!" Mezu announced. "Oh, you think?" Gozu asked sarcastically. "Stop it with the questions!" "What questions?" "Uh oh," Pepe said, knowing he was discovered. He didn't see that somebody was perched up on a set of fire exit stairs, watching. "It's over," Mezu told him. "Any last words?" Gozu laughed. "Yeah! You're finished!" With electricity crackling throughout his body, Pepe rushed at the Jaguar Ninjas. But to his surprise, Mezu transformed into a whirlwind of water and drew in his prey. The dizzy Pepe spun around for a moment until being boosted into the air like a geyser. Gozu popped up and kicked him right into a brick wall. Thinking they were about to kill Kim Jae Hoon, Mezu laughed. "We have him now." Gozu noticed the young man watching them. "Hey, who the hell are you? And what are you doing up there?" "Me?" He sat on the fire escape, running his blade-like fingers through his filthy red hair. His face was covered up by said hair. "I'm just a man. I'm here because I choose to be. And nothing you cretins do can change that." "Cretins?" Gozu growled. "Who the hell do you think you are?" "I just told you. I do what I want, when I want." He hopped down and landed gracefully between the hurt Pepe and the angry Jaguar Ninjas. "To who I want. And nothing on this earth can stop that. Your laws are nothing to me. The concept of justice is nothing to me. This globe is my playground, making me free to do whatever I wish. That is why they call me Freeman." Mezu held out his arm blade so that it refracted a street light's glimmer. "Get out of our way, freak." "You just don't listen, do you." Freeman shook his head and slowly walked towards Mezu. In a rapid motion, he spun around and backflipped over the blue ninja. Before Mezu knew what was going on, Freeman's razor-sharp hand tore through his chest and pulled back out. Upon noticing the gaping hole going through him, Mezu fell forward and died. "What did you just do!?" "I did what I felt like doing. Now are you just as stupid as your friend here?" Rather than ask a question, Gozu answered by lunging his right arm blade. With a wave of his hand, Freeman cut it to metal shards. He picked Gozu up by the neck and looked down. "Shh... Shouldn't be so violent. Enjoy this last moment of your life." *SLASH* He dropped the ninja to the ground and lurched towards the downed Pepe. He reached his hand out to help. "Take my hand." "You... you killed them." "Take my hand, I said." Pepe hesitantly shook Freeman's hand and let him pull him up. "Thanks! You, you saved my l-- ACK!" Freeman wiped the blood off of his hands using Pepe's baggy pants. He stood straight up and left him there to rot. "No. I didn't." [---] Author's Notes Well, it's been a while since we've seen a new Kimpro chapter, but hopefully E. Honda jokes are still enjoyed by the masses. Considering the end of the somewhat major arc about the election, I figured this chapter may serve as a new beginning where Blackheart's big plans are on the horizon. Plus it finally gets Freeman in the mix while getting rid of the gasmask ninjas who nobody seems to like. Yoshimitsu, in his Tekken 4 guise, is based on Frank the Rabbit from the mindfuck movie Donnie Darko. If you've never seen it and don't get it, don't worry about it. Hopefully I'll be able to explain more about him in a future chapter. Keep in mind that he's *supposed* to be mysterious. Why is Battler Man retiring? Let's just say it's part of a Batman parody that's long overdue. Thanks to Wildfire and Demonicuss for prereading. Up next is... uh... yeah. Gavin "Gavok" Jasper Half Horse Productions http://www.rit.edu/~gjj2192 [---] In the bathroom of the Galactus' Shoe Hotel in South Town, Dong Hwan had just finished brushing his teeth. Just like his daddy taught him to do thrice a day. He couldn't understand what was going on with that purple bug guy, but strangely enough, he hadn't been caught yet at all for successfully burning down Kusanagi Tower. Heck, Dr. Doom didn't even wake up in the movie theater until after he sat back down and the credits started rolling. "Dong..." He turned around to see Yoshimitsu standing on the other side of the bathroom. "Hey, you made me miss that Johnny Cage movie, you son of a biscuit!" He advanced. "I'm going to-- ow!" He bounced off of a forcefield. "I'm going to-- ow! I'm going to-- ow!" "There's a forcefield, moron..." Dong put his hand on it and watched his handprint ripple. "Cool!" He tried zapping the invisible wall with electricity, but the crackling blue bolts only spread throughout it. "Cooler! How do you do that?" Yoshimitsu put his hand on the forcefield, almost touching Dong's. "I can do anything, Dong Hwan... and so can you..." "Can I bang Cassandra and Sophitia Alexander at the same time?" "Uh... sure... Why not..." Dong cracked his sleepy grin again. "What are you, anyway?" "Do you believe in time travel...?" "If I didn't, then I wouldn't be wanting to bang two chicks from ancient Greece, would I?" "Touche... You did well today, Dong Hwan... We'll keep in touch..." "What's your screenname? I'm electricdong432. I'm usually on dur--" Dong was interrupted by the sound of knocking. He looked over and noticed that Yoshimitsu had vanished. "Dong, talk to your delusions some other time! Doom needs to tinkle and he needs to tinkle NOW! ...uh oh. Nevermind. God, that's going to rust."